


Closer

by miniaturemice



Category: Karneval
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Fluff, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-06-10
Updated: 2012-06-10
Packaged: 2017-11-07 10:21:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 13,997
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/429975
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/miniaturemice/pseuds/miniaturemice
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Gareki isn't too impressed. Nai is a little too impressed. These things happen.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Closer

**Author's Note:**

> So. My first Karneval fic. Done because I needed highschool!Nai/Gareki and _there was none ___. I'm moving everything from my ff.net account to ao3. Yeah.

****

_Prologue_

**_Gareki_**

He wakes up suddenly, sitting up in his bed. Running a hand through his black hair, the teen groans and wonders to himself, "What was I dreaming about?" He tries his best to remember it but can't come up with anything more concrete than a flash of white hair and a child-like smile, innocent and bright. He dismisses and steals a glance at the clock hanging above his door. An hour before school starts.

_I should get up._

Padding softly to the small toilet, he flings the door open. He doesn't bother to close the door and just begins his daily routine of getting ready-washing his face and brushing his teeth, stripping and a cold shower. He dries himself off and grabs his neatly folded uniform off a makeshift table. He wears his usual black tank top under the unbuttoned jacket.

The apartment is small and sparse. There is no living room or anything frivolous. The front door leads to his room immediately. There are only packed boxes stacked against the walls and his bed is the only thing that looks unkempt. There is no hallway and the only two doors in the apartment lead to the toilet and kitchen respectively. He has been living here for the past two years.

It is nearly time to leave for school. Gareki picks his small bag up and walks out the door. As he locks the gate and door after ensuring that the alarm system he has set up is working, he turns around and looks at the apartment block adjacent to his. He catches sight of white hair but when he looks again, it isn't there. He scowls, leaning back against the door. He wonders,

_What is going on today?_

**_Nai_**

Nai runs around the apartment two hours before school starts. He bumps into Karoku who laughs and steadies him. The older boy tells him to slow down and walk, don't run around. Nai worries about high school, he worries that he won't be able to make friends, won't be able to catch up with the others, he worries because Karoku is going to be at a university and won't be here as often and what is Nai going to do?

Karoku laughs again and this time it reassures Nai because Karoku's laugh is warm and soft, it comforts him. Karoku tells him that it'll be okay and that anyway, as long as he is Nai's favourite person nothing will change and Karoku will always like Nai best so don't worry. He flings his arms around Karoku's waist and hugs him tightly.

_"Okay._ " he says softly into the other boy's stomach.

After some breakfast, both Karoku and Nai head out. Nai looks around the sky as Karoku locks up the door. They've only just moved in last month but it feels like they've been here for longer than that. The room certainly looks that way, anyway with books strewn all over the place. They have a small garden on the windowsill where Karoku grows some plants and Nai names them because he thinks things ought to be named.

Nai watches as a boy in the apartment block right in front of him locks his own door. He's wearing the same uniform as Nai and he's probably a senpai, when Nai thinks about it. He marvels at the boy's tall and lean frame, at how pretty he looks with black hair falling into his eyes. He sees the boy bend down and catches a glimpse of his collarbone and somehow, the sight causes Nai to widen his eyes.

"Nai?" Karoku calls. He is already a long way down the corridor. Nai shakes his head and hurries after him.

****

_They meet on the second day of the new term._

**_Gareki_**

"Gareki!" I hear Hirato call my name and try to run immediately. Nothing good ever comes out of talking to the principal. I don't have any luck, that speccie grabs my wrist and pulls me from behind. He smiles at me but I can see the smirk he has in his eyes.

"What?" I ask him, allowing irritation to seep into my voice. "I gave you the report for that intrusion this morning already."

"That's not what I wanted to talk to you about," he says patiently. I hate it when he talks to me like I'm  _six_. I'm sixteen, goddamnit! I feel heat rush up to my face and a really snappy retort coming up my throat but it dies down when I see a boy with white hair hiding behind him.

_What the…_

"I see you've spotted Nai already," Hirato says brightly and coaxes the boy in front of him. He's wearing a sweater and cargo pants. He's trembling noticeably so I guess he's one of those shy types. More interestingly, he has white hair. I'm suddenly reminded of the dream I had yesterday night. I shake my head in an effort to clear those thoughts away and look at him again.

He looks taken aback and rushes behind Hirato.  _What did I do…._

"Gareki,it might help if you don't glare at poor Nai that way."

"What are you talking about? I'm not glaring!"

"It must hard for you to be born with a facial tic that makes it seem as though you're angry all the time."

"What!?"

Hirato pushes his glasses up, ignoring me. Damn this man…

"If you're not going to say anything, I'm leaving," I tell him and I'm about to stalk off when his next words make me stop in my tracks.

"Don't you want to pay off your debts?"

I don't turn around.

"All you have to do is take care of Nai here for a while until he gets used to the school and I'll consider it cleared."

I look back and see Hirato's face, serious.

"Why me?" I ask. "Why him?"

"Because the school owes a favour to his guardian. And you owe a favour to me."

"So basically you're giving him to me because you don't want to do it yourself?" I fix him with a bored look.

"That's about it!"

Mentally, I slap a hand to my forehead.

"So…." Hirato looks at me and grins ferally. I don't like that look very much.

"Take care of Nai well!" He turns tail and walks away quickly before I can say anything, leaving me alone with this weird white-haired kid.

_Great._

**_Nai_**

Gareki doesn't look too happy to be with me. He glares at me before walking down the corridor and gestures that I should follow him. He has longer legs and takes these big strides. There's no noise when he moves and I'm staring at his long legs and even longer strides…he reminds me of a cat, padding along gracefully and silently.  _A black cat,_  I think to myself. His voice shakes me out of my thoughts.

"How old are you?"

"I'm fifteen."

"First year,eh?" His eyes stare at me appraisingly. I feel violated.

"Tch," I hear him mutter. "He looks more like twelve."

"I'm not twelve!" I frown. I have enough self-esteem issues with looking so small.

"…Right…" Gareki nods, clearly disbelieving.

"How old are you, anyway?"

"I'm sixteen." I feel a jab of jealously at that. Sixteen but he's already so tall…I'm only at his elbow. Where is that growth spurt Karoku promised me?

"Where are you taking me?" I ask, remembering that it's after school.

"I'm supposed to take care of you, right? You can go sit in the corner while I work on something." He opens the door and I peek in. It's a workshop.

He walks over to one of the long wooden tables at the side where there are plans on the surface. He glances over at me.

"You can do your own homework or thing there," he points to the table at the far end of the room.

Instead, I walk over to the seat in front of him. He stares at me, his black eyes questioning.

"Can I watch?" I ask, settling on the wooden stool cross-legged.

He ducks his head so his hair falls into his eyes. He reminds me of someone….I tilt my head to the side.

"Okay. But don't make any noise."

He picks up a screwdriver and starts fiddling with a metal box, looking up every now and then at the plans. I watch him attentively at first but my mind starts to wander…I'm feeling tired… this isn't really taking care of me… I fall asleep.

**_Gareki_**

It's quite some time before I look at Nai again. I was just about finished with the box when I remembered he was still here.

I close my eyes, stretching. "Hey, let's go," I say. He doesn't say anything and I crack an eye open to see why.

He's sleeping soundly, his chin cradled in a hand.

I smirk. I guess he really is twelve.

I watch him sleeping, his small frame moving up and down in sync with his breathing. I wonder...why is he so important? Why does he need someone to take care of him? Well...He does have that innocent, gullible look. Yogi would probably be a better match though. Maybe it's because he's a third-year that Hirato doesn't want to let him do this. Maybe it's not important enough. Hrmph. That does make me a bit mad though, the thought that I would be given the lightweight duties. Didn't I already prove my worth in the last two sting operations?Whatever... I stand up,making enough noise to stir Nai up.

He blinks at me sleepily and the thought comes unbidden... _cute._

_What did I just think?_

"Are you okay,Gareki?" Nai asks groggily. "Your face's red."

"No,it isn't."

"Yes,it is." he says, rubbing his eyes.

"Shut up." I walk out of the room, leaving the door open and wait for Nai oustide, leaning on the wall.

_What was I thinking?_

****

 

_In which Nai meets Yogi and Tsukumo._

**_Nai_**

We're walking to the bus stop together after Gareki collected his things from the locker. The afternoon isn't too hot and everything's so pretty. The pink sakura petals fall from the trees and I stare, amazed. I pull on Gareki's sleeve, bringing his attention to me.

"What?" He asks, annoyed. His voice sounds rather rough and low. His face is still red and I wonder if it's because the trek downhill was winding for him. Ah, but Gareki looks fit so I don't really think that's much of a problem for him.

"Look, Gareki!" I point out the trees to him. "It's so pretty! Do they have this every year?"

He looks at me strangely, eyebrow raised. "Every spring. Don't you see the cherry blossoms every year?"

I shake my head, "No, where Karoku and I lived, there wasn't anything like this...It was all just normal green trees."

"Karoku? Your brother?" Gareki asks. "Why aren't you calling him aniki or nii-san? It's rude, you know. Come to think of it, you're not calling me sempai either." He narrows his eyes at me.

"But Gareki is Gareki. Just like how Karoku is Karoku." I'm confused. Does he want me to call him sempai?

"Gareki looks at me weirdly and I wonder if I have something on my face. I rub my face with my sleeve but there's nothing.

"I don't get it," he mutters under his breath. I don't think I was supposed to have heard it but I have good hearing. Karoku says it's called a "heightened sense of hearing".

"It's just..." I try to explain. "Karoku's always been with me. I woke up and he was there. His hand is warm like the sun. Karoku's mine."

"Alright, alright." Gareki shrugs. "He's yours." He looks at me then and laughs.

Gareki's laugh is loud and harsh, it sounds like a short bark but I like it. It sounds bright too, like something he doesn't do usually.

"You have the petals all over your hair." He snorts, trying to stifle his laughter with his hand.

"Wha-" I reach up to my hair and realise there's almost a small mountain of pink petals on my head.

I shake my head and it all rains down on me like a shower.

"Amazing..." Gareki says, his voice laced with amusement. "You're an airhead."

_**Gareki**_

Before I realise it,we've reached the bus stop. I'm surprised at myself. I sound disappointed? Why on earth would I be disappointed? It's not like I like being with this complete airhead. I'm curious about him though. He says he's never seen the cherry blossoms before. Does he come from a long way from here? In all fifteen years of life and he's never seen cherry blossoms. It makes me wonder what else he hasn't seen. And of course, that brings my mind to areas I would rather not have thought about in front of him. It makes me turn bright red and I cough sheepishly into my hand, hoping these sort of thoughts would go away.

"Gareki?" His face pops up right in front of me. "Are you okay?" he questions concernedly, his wide eyes make him look like a pre-schooler.

"I'm okay," I push him away. I don't want to be anywhere near him right now.

We stand there in awkward silence for a few moments before I break it.

"Which bus are you taking?"

"I'm taking service 107."

...107? Oh damn.

"I'm taking that one too..." I say reluctantly.

"Really? Gareki! We can sit beside each other every day!"

_I'd much rather not..._

"Yeah." I answer him reluctantly.

_Every day with this kid? This isn't how I envisioned my second year of high school._

Out of nowhere, someone runs into me and I almost fall over. The guy's on top of me, almost straddling.

"What the-" I push him off. He grins at me, flashing a peace sign at me as a way of greeting.

"Yogi," I snarl at him, "You could have just said hello."

"But this is so much more fun!" Ha laughs at me and gets up, brushing his pants off. "Don't be such a tsundere, Gareki. You know you like it.~"

"Like hell I do," I sneer but accept the hand he's offering me to get up anyway.

As much as it pains me to say this...this guy's Yogi. He's my sempai but he hardly acts like one so I don't see why I should address him as such. Yogi's a third-year and in the fencing club. He has blonde wavy hair and incredibly optimistic. He's optimistic to the point of stupidity.

Nai is staring wide-eyed at us,more than a little confused. Yogi brightens up when he sees Nai.

"Is this the little guy Hirato-san said you're supposed to take care of,Gareki?"

Nai beams at him and waves. "Hi!I'm Nai!"

"Whoaaaa, he's so cute! Gareki,you don't deserve this level of cuteness!" Yogi shouts...way too loudly.

"You idiot! Keep it down!" I smack his head, too aware of people staring at us.

"Ow...Gareki, that hurts." Yogi looks at me with sad, teary eyes but I'm not going to fall for it. Nai is reaching out to pat him. Yogi grins at him. Clearly, he wasn't that hurt. They both smile at each other. I feel like I'm being enveloped in an aura of complete stupidity. They were made for each other.

"Little Nai!" Yogi proclaims and Nai grins at him (W _ait...what, you're actually going to accept that name_?).

"From henceforth, I'll take care of you! Forget that evil mean overlord known as Gareki there!Nyanpello will be a brother to you!"

I'm embarrassed. Ugh, I try inching away but there's no use. People have already associated me with this idiot. And he has to bring up the school mascot of all things!

"Nyanpello?" Nai's head cocks to the side adorably _. Did I just think that?_ Shaking my head, I notice that Yogi's already flung an arm around Nai's shoulder and telling him all about the freaky furry cat costume he wears.

"Uwaaaaah," Nai sounds like a girl, "It sounds so cool!"

Hmm...well, that's an adjective I haven't heard used for Nyanpello.

Yogi takes his duty seriously though. He believes that it spreads joy and love to the middle school kids and they do seem to like it. It's beyond me how he can even like prancing around that way. The bus comes soon afterwards and both Nai and I board it.

Nai presses his face to the window, waving goodbye to Yogi while I search around in my bag for my music player.

I jam the earpiece into my ears and press play.

_It's been a long day._

_****_

_In which Nai and Karoku discuss things over a meal._

**Nai**

"Uwah! It's delicious, Karoku!" I tell him, happily stuffing more of the tasty food into my mouth.

Karoku smiles at me before raising his own fork to feed himself . He swallows before saying, "It should! I slaved for it!"

I laugh and thank him. It really is good... I wonder if Gareki's eating dinner now...I wonder if it's good...Does he cook his own meals? Does Gareki live alone? He didn't say anything about siblings or ...

"...Nai?Nai?" I look up, surprised to find Karoku's waving his right hand in front of my face worriedly.

"What's wrong?" He questions, concern all over his features. "You're spacing out."

"It's nothing," I answer absent-mindedly.

"Is something wrong?"

"No, I was just thinking about Gareki." I answer honestly, feeling my cheeks go warm. It feels strange to turn red, it's not as though I'm embarrassed. I haven't really told Karoku about Gareki. I wanted to tell Karoku but when I reached home on the first day of the term, he was sprawled out on the sofa, sleeping. His classes are really exhausting and they tire him out so much. I haven't had a chance to talk with Karoku for the past few weeks. Somehow,I get this feeling that Karoku might not like Gareki but I can't think of any reasons. After all, Karoku would like Gareki. He says I should be happy always and lately, being with Gareki does make me happy.

"Ah?" Karoku raises an eyebrow at me. "Gareki?"

I nod, wondering if I should tell. But before I can decide,my mouth moves on its own.

"Karoku, you'd really like Gareki! He's really nice! I mean, sometimes he's kind of mean but then he looks at you and it's not that he's actually mean or wanted to hurt or anything, that's just the way he is. And Gareki makes these really cool airship models and he works on them sometimes and when he's in the workshop, Gareki looks really cool with his clothes and his arms are wow, Karoku,I didn't know arms could be really skinny but strong at the same time. And he's reaaaaally tall and you said I'd be tall-"

"Wait, wait," Karoku interrupts, looking confused and raises his hand to stop me from going on.

"Gareki's your friend?"

I nod furtively, "Yep,I just told you!"

Karoku laughs, "No, you didn't. You really like him, huh ? "

I feel my face getting warm again but answer anyway, "Gareki's nice."

Karoku snorts at that but his eyes look at me curiously now like he knows something but isn't sure.

"Almost as much as me?" Karoku quips.

I nod slowly and he gasps.Gareki "Wow,really?" He drops his fork and spoon to cover his face. "I've been overthrown!" Karoku pretends to sob .

I stick my tongue out and we resume eating again.

After a few moments, I speak up again.

"Karoku...are we brothers?"

"Ah?" He tilts his head at me. "Brothejrs...what brought this on?"

"Gareki was asking and I..."

"Ah,Gareki again?" Karoku pauses before beginning, "Well, I suppose we are,Nai. I'm your legal guardian. I found you in the park near my house when I was in high school. No one came to pick you up at the orphanage and over time, I guess, I sort of took you in."

I've heard this before and I know he's my legal guardian but...

"So we're not brothers?"

"I guess we both are and aren't." Karoku said softly. "Do you want to be?"

I think about that for a bit before answering. "I...I don't need Karoku to be my nii-chan. Karoku's mine anyway."

Karoku's eyes light up when I said that. Before he had been looking at me tiredly, almost sadly as though he was hurting.

"That's true, Nai. I'll always be yours and you'll always be mine."

"...Karoku? Can I..Do you want me to call you nii-chan? Gareki says it's a form of respect."

Karoku was drinking his glass of water but he sputters when I ask him.

He's wiping his mouth and looking at the ceiling when I repeat it again.

"Should I?"

"...Maybe we could just try it?" He suggests.

"Karoku nii-chan," The words taste funny in my mouth, not quite right. "Do you like it?"

He turns red and drops his head onto the table. I can't see his face. His voice is muffled when he says," ...Let's just stick to Karoku, Nai."

Ah... I guess he didn't like it.

**Gareki**

I'm sitting on my bed, doing homework and eating instant noodles at the same time. Putting aside the maths, I turn to pick up the required reading I have to finish by tomorrow. Shoveling the curry-flavoured noodles in my mouth, I try my best to focus on the book. But it's boring and dull and...ah, I don't want to do this. I throw it aside before pulling a motorbike magazine from underneath my bed. It's my prize.

"One day, I'm going to own of these babies," I think, drooling over the X-15.

Before I realise it, an hour has gone by and I still haven't finished the reading. Forget it, I'll just do it tomorrow on the bus.

I go out for a bit to throw my trash at the end of the corridor where there's an automatic trash disposal area. I glance to my side as I walk by, recognising the area where my eyes are drawn to immediately. The apartment where Nai lives. I found out the first day when we both got off the same stop and walked in the same direction. Nowadays, we meet each other at the bus stop in the morning. ..It's not like I planned it. It's just a coincidence we both take the same bus at the same time.The lights are on and the entire apartment glows a bright yellow. I can see silhouettes on the curtain. Nai's small frame and a much taller man eating dinner on a table. They're both talking animatedly.

 I wonder what they're talking about.

****

 

_Exam week. For the duration of it, neither Nai nor Gareki see each other very much._

**_Gareki_**

I trudge my way up the hill, nose in a textbook. Of all the subjects to put together, why did they have to put Modern War History and Literature together? The two subjects with the most amount of memorisation within a day. I sigh heavily, it's a between-a-rock-and-a-hard-place. I either fail one or the other. Damnit...I can't afford to fail either and bring down my grade point average. I've always been hovering above 3.8. The sakura flowers have long stopped blooming and its petals now just littered the road. With the way they've been trampled all, they didn't look pretty at all.

Instead, the petals looked dirty and all squished. I wouldn't go as far as to say it was ugly but...definitely not pretty. I don't think even Nai would have called it pretty.

Ah...Thinking of Nai reminds me that I haven't seen him in over a week. Exam  _week_ is a misnomer. The exams last way longer than a week. But Nai's probably done with his's. He doesn't take as many subjects as I do and being a freshman means the teachers give more leeway. How lucky.

I'm almost done with mine...just today and two more on the day after tomorrow.

I can see him then. Unbidden, a smile forces its way on my face and I wipe it away just as quickly. Gah, who would want to see him? I've never met anyone as utterly clueless as he is. He even dared to ask me what  _x_  was when I was helping him with algebra. I feel sorry for his teachers, it must be the same brand of stupidity as Yogi's. Although,in actual fact,Yogi is pretty smart. He's an _A-_  student.

Ah,I thought I was just going to pass out from the sheer aura of his innocence when he asked me that. Or perhaps I'll become stupid too. How terrifying it is to think that it might be contagious. I wouldn't be able to maintain my grades if that was the case. But lately my practical for Mechanical Engineering hasn't gone well. Nai keeps staring at me as I work. I can't focus with his eyes on me. And lately, it's been getting warmer so I just wear a tank top in the workshop. With his eyes on me, I just can't concentrate.

Shaking my head, I check my watch. Shit! I'm going to be late!Ah,crap,crap,crap!

I stow the book away in my bag and run all the way up.

**Nai**

I kick the ground sadly. Lately, it's been really lonely without Gareki. I've made some friends with my classmates and I got close with a boy (who looks like a girl) named Yanari. But Yanari's always chauffeured to and from school so there's nobody who can take the bus with me. He's smart and likes to play around with gadgets...I wish there was someone with me. Before, when I had Karoku with me all the time, I didn't really think about how it would be without him.

It's not that I don't have him anymore...but there's a distance between us that can't be overcome. And with Gareki, there's that distance too but I feel like I can be closer and I want to be closer.

Does this mean that if I become closer with Gareki,I'll be further from Karoku. I have to give and take... But ..I don't want to...

I'm lost in my thoughts that I don't notice someone else has joined me on the bench at the bus stop.

The person places a hand on my shoulder and I jump. Wah, who's that! I'm really surprised.

It's a really pretty girl, a little taller than me. She has really pretty blond wavy hair which she's tied into pigtails. She blinks at me, her long eyelashes batting up and down. She's so pretty!

"Are you Nai?" Her voice is low and measured. She gives off this feeling of someone who's cool and calm...and what's that word? We learnt it in class a few days ago...ah, collected! She looks like she knows everything and has it all in control.

I nod and stick my hand out. I smile at her really widely, she makes me feel like I should give her the best I can! Just like Gareki...

"I'm Nai!"

She smiles gently at me before taking my hand in hers. Lacing our fingers together, she gives it a slight squeeze and says,

"Hello, I'm Tsukumo. I heard about you from Yogi."

"Yogi sempai? Is Tsukumo...my sempai too?"

"Hai,I'm in the same year as Yogi." She laughs a bit, it sounds like bells are tinkling. Uwah...Tsukumo really is pretty...

"Nai, you're the first person I've met who addresses Yogi as sempai! All our kouhai in the fencing club don't even do that!"

"But Yogi-sempai's so cool!"

"...Amazing, I never thought someone would actually say that about him," Tsukumo sempai looks at me, smiling. "Anyway, Nai-kun, I wanted to ask you how are you doing in school? I'm on the student welfare board, you see. Is Gareki-kun taking good care of you?"

"Gareki?" I nod furtively. "Gareki takes really good care of me! He's really nice..."

I want to say more but thinking about Gareki makes me feel kind of sad. I miss Gareki.

Tsukumo sempai notices it and doesn't say anything. We sit there silently for a few moments.

"Gareki-kun's having exams now... It's Literature and Modern war History for his year today. Do you miss him?"

I don't trust myself to say anything without crying suddenly. I suddenly miss Gareki so much, his rare laugh and smiles that make his eyes go  _up, up, up_  and curve into cat eyes. I miss his long strides and the way he looks back at me and shouts, "Hurry up!" I nod slowly.

Without looking at me, Tsukumo sempai looks straight ahead. She puts her hand over mine. It's comforting to be touched, like she's telling me she knows and it's okay with her.

"I'm sure Gareki misses you too."

I can't say anything but I'm full of happiness when I hear her words.

"Do you think so?"

"...Hai."

"Arigato, Tsukumo-sempai." I fling my arms around her and hug her tightly. At first, she stiffens in surprise but she puts her arms around me and hugs back. I think my heart might give out. I don't like thinking that Gareki might be sad. But if he's sad because he misses me.. Is it wrong that I feel happy? I feel guilty...But I am happy.

****

_Level up! In which, Gareki becomes a tutor in addition to Nai's baby-sitter._

**_Gareki_**

"Nai..." My voice is low, I can't believe it. "Your grade for Mech is absolutely horrible."

He hangs in his head in shame and doesn't say anything. I can see the tints of red on his cheeks. Well, he  _should_  be embarrassed. An E, really?

"So that's why you should take him on, Gareki-kun." The mech teacher folds his arm and nods at the two of us. "Hirato-san said you'd be happy to, anyway."

I...wait,Hirato? That stupid speccie!

"Hirato? Sensei, wait, I-"

"It's settled then," the bastard's already turning to leave the workshop. "I'll leave Nai in your care."

He's left without another word. I swallow down the curses I just wish I could throw at the both of them; that stupid speccie and sensei.

I turn to face Nai who's staring down at his feet. He looks really upset. I can't say I blame him, I'm upset about this too. This takes more of my time that I'm meant to work on for the project for the showcase.

"Ah, Nai," Feeling sorry for him, I ruffle his hair in an uncharacteristic gesture. Characteristic for Yogi possibly but not for me. I don't quite like touching people but Nai's hair feel soft.

"Gareki...I'm sorry you have to tutor me. I'm sorry I failed the exam." He sounds completely heartbroken. This makes me feel a bit guilty. I suppose I didn't have to tell him that his grade is abysmal. I mean, it is. But I didn't have to explicitly say it, I guess.

Looking at his stricken face makes me feel even guiltier. He looks more torn up about it. In the back of my mind, I wonder if Karoku insists on good grades. From the way, Nai goes on and on about the guy though, the impression I've formed is Karoku's some kind of good-looking genius who's amazingly kind. Nai told me about Karoku's reaction to calling him onii-chan. ...It's awkward but I vaguely suspect he might have a brother complex.

"Nai," I say, nudging the white-haired boy. "Come on, let's go over to the table. We can start with the basics."

He nods slightly and I catch sight of his watery eyes. Damn, don't tell me he's actually crying over this? Does he hate having to spend more time with me? I thought he liked me, if the past weeks have been any indication. I sigh inwardly. I don't understand this guy at all.

_**Nai**_

When Gareki's not looking, I wipe my eyes with the corner of my sleeve. I just feel so bad. I mean, I didn't feel bad when I received the marks but I felt so horrible, seeing Gareki's expression when he was told that he has to tutor me. I know that Gareki has really little time left and he needs to finish up the project he's working on for the showcase. And he's been so excited about showing it to everyone the dirt bike he's been ]working on since first year. He says it'll completely change the way people race and that's good for the school when the races begin. But the dirt bike's prototype isn't going so well and Gareki has to tutor me and I feel so bad for doing this to him.

"Nai?" Gareki calls over from the wooden table at the corner. He's already opening the textbook and flipping through the pages. Slowly, I shuffle over to where he is and take a seat beside him. Gareki didn't say anything about how I'm troubling him but I am, I know it. It makes me feel worse inside.

I wonder if it's possible to make it up to him somehow. Before, I thought to myself that if he's sad because of me, I'd be happy. Selfishly, I would be happy But now, it's a different matter to see how that I'm not of any use to him at all and instead making things difficult. What if he decides he doesn't like me anymore?

This brings a fresh new wave of tears to the back of my eyes. I blink it away.

Gareki's leaning towards me, his chin in his propped up hand. "Nai," he begins slowly. "Don't feel so bad, you just need a bit of help, that's all. Once you understand, it'll be fine."

I nod unhappily, unable to buy into this. Mech's so hard, it isn't as effortless as Gareki makes it out to be.

Gareki points to a page.

"Apparently, from what I've seen of your paper," he nods at the exam paper beside him. "Your weak point is 4D diagrams."

"So I think we'll start by practicing how to draw the diagrams that way you'll understand better." He continues.

We get to work immediately with Gareki showing me if you draw the edges first, it'll be easier.

Over the next few days, Gareki teaches me more and it's gotten to the point where he gives me work to do and I do it while he tinkers away beside me on his project. Every now and then, Gareki looks over my shoulder to check how I'm doing. He'll sling an arm over and point out where I've gone wrong.

My heart beats faster whenever his skin touches mine. Is this normal? I feel all hot and warm whenever he's close to me that I can feel his breath on my neck. Uwah...I feel dizzy, thinking about it.

Gareki's given me the blueprints of his work and told me to copy the diagrams out so he can have a second copy and so I'll get some practice. It makes me smile really wide with heady happiness that Gareki trusts me with his work enough that he'd let me help him. Before, he wouldn't even let me touch the prototype but lately, he's been nice to me.

He's been so nice, touching me (and when he touches me, it's so quick that although my heart rate feels like it triples, the contact is always too short) every now and then on the shoulder or head. And when he smiles and it's that cat eyes smile and he laughs. Gareki Gareki Gareki. Even his name makes me feel all warm.

Gareki turns to look at me and smiles. I turn red and drop my pencil. His hair seems to glow in the afternoon light shafting from the window. So pretty and his arms look strong and his collarbone jutting out. Gareki... I don't know how else to put it.

I really really _really_ like Gareki.

****

_In which there is a school showcase event and a meeting._

 

**_Nai_**

I pull on Karoku's hand. He's dawdling, stopping by to look at the other second years' projects in botany. Occasionally, he'd comment on it or give some advice to the student. Some of the girls smiled at him really weirdly and they would put a hand or his arm. I think they liked him. But Karoku would just shrug it off and smile at them before walking away really quickly. But he was dawdling  _now_ and I wasn't happy about it.

"Karoku," I whine. I wanted to hurry up to the hall where Gareki was displaying his own project. The school had decided that they would undertake its production and agreed to finance it so Gareki could work on making more of it. My upcoming test on Mech was next week but I wasn't particularly worried. Gareki had taught me well enough that he said that I'd do well enough to pass.

"And if you don't," Gareki sighed. "I don't know what to say."

Ahhhhh, I'll definitely do well for the test! I'm not going to disappoint Gareki.

"Nai,Nai,Nai," Karoku laughed at me as I pulled him harder and we began racing up the staircase to the second level. "What's the rush?"

I tugged on his hand harder. "Karoku ,it's Gareki's display I want to show you! It's really cool and you can see the blueprints I helped copy out. Gareki promised that he'd show it out today so I could show you!" I turned to send him a glare I didn't mean. Well,okay, maybe a little. He really was slowing us down.

If anything though,my words didn't seem to reach Karoku. Instead, he dragged his feet! I can't go any faster than this! He weighs too much. I made a mental note that I had to remind him to stop snacking so much while he works on his assignments and projects.

I wanted to just let go of his hand and go off first. Karoku was being so stubborn! This was so unfair. Didn't he want to see the blueprints I helped with? Didn't he want to see Gareki? I don't understand why he's taking such a long time.

"Nai?" I heard someone call my name from behind. I turned around to see Tsukum-senpai and Yogi walking towards us. Yogi greeted us with a peace sign and a "yo!" while Tsukumo-senpai politely bowed towards Karoku. She formally greeted him and introduced herself and Yogi to him. Yogi smiled at Karoku politely before grabbing my hand. He pulled me to the side while Karoku looked at us worriedly. Tsukumo-senpai tried to distract him and I was glad to see that they seemed to get on okay.

"Gareki's been looking for you," Yogi told me, grinning. "I think he misses you ,hahahaha! You better get to hall quick or the swarm of girls are really going to get in your way. It's more crowded than the school gift shop on weekends!"

"Really?" I ask. Gareki…missed me? The thought makes me turn red and smile to myself.

"Ehhh~" Yogi pokes my cheek. "Do you like Gareki more than me?" He pouts and that makes me laugh.

"Maybe?" I answer, laughing too. "I like both Yogi and Gareki differently!"

"Different,how?" he teases. "Like you want to kiss him?"

K-kiss? I'm so surprised and all the blood rushes up to my face.I cover my face. K-kiss?

Without looking, I can hear Yogi laugh at me and he forces me to uncover my face.

"So it's that way,hm?" Without warning, he grabs my hand again and we run off. Tsukumo-senpai shouts behind us, "Matte!Where are you going?"

Yogi laughs again and I can feel the warm vibrations run through me with our hands together.

"Meet us at the hall,Tsukumo-chan!"

**_Gareki_**

It's so hot in here. I loosen my tie and make my way to a chair at the side. The response is so much more than I had ever hoped for. I had two company representatives make their spiels to me about how much they would love to have me work for them after graduation. But grad isn't for some time so I waved them off but took down their contacts. It's always good to be prepared after all. I might not be staying in this city afterwards. Maybe I'll move closer to the capital.

However, before I ever reach that chair, two girls have intercepted me.

"Oh no," I think. "Not again."

And the horrible flirting starts up again.

"Gareki-kun," the girl on the right croons. Her skirt's too short, five inches above the knee and her badly dyed blond hair makes her look slightly slutty. Not that her friend's any better with the amount of make-up she slathered on. Where's Tsukumo to keep the girls in line when you need her?

"We absolutely adored the presentation you gave!" Her friend moves forward abruptly ,trips and makes to fall on me.

I grabbed her arm before she a tight smile as a I help her back to her feet, I tell the two girls, "I'm glad you enjoyed it. I'm busy at the moment so maybe we could talk another time?"

That's a lie. I'm on my break right now.

They eagerly nod and as I walk away, I hear them sighing about how cool and hard-working I am. The blonde, thinking I'm out of earshot, tells the other about how much she would love to date me.

…The ego boost is good.

I finally get to the empty chair and drag it backstage. Once there, I flop down. It's a relief to be somewhere empty.

Ahhh…

I've closed my eyes and I'm about to doze off when I hear a familiar voice.

"I bet he's here if he's not out front."

"Are you sure, Yogi? I don't think we're allowed here."

"Nonsense! I'm Nyanpello, little Nai!"

So he's finally arrived? The thought of Nai makes me feel warm inside and I'll grudgingly admit it, I am happy to know he came to see me.

The backstage is pretty full so there wasn't much place to sit which was why I had dragged a chair here. Yogi leaned on the wall while Nai settled himself on a pile of boxes.

"Gareki!" Nai began. "There were so many people so we couldn't find you!"

"I'm on my break right now, I wasn't there anyway. Why did you take so long?" I ask, taking a packet of gum out of my blazer pocket and eating one.

Yogi took it out of my hand without asking and helped himself to it. He tossed it to Nai who took another.

"Karoku wanted to look at something." Nai answers.

"Oh, he's here?" So I finally get to meet this Karoku.

Nai nods vigorously.

"I put out the blueprints you helped me with so-"

"I know!We saw!" Nai beams at me and I feel the familiar rush of heat in my stomach and cheeks.

Yogi is looking at us back and forth with a shit-eating smile on his face. What's going on?

He stands up suddenly and pats me on the back.

"Gareki,I trust you know what to do from here." he tells me.

"What the hell are you talking about?"

He waggles his eyebrows. "I have to go find Tsukumo. Karoku's here so you can meet the  _family_!"

Family? Nai's… Is this what he's talking about? That he thinks Nai and I are…that way?

I almost choke on my gum. I cough and cough in an attempt to stop myself from choking. Yogi's already left, that bastard. Nai hops down from his perch and hurries over to me.

His small hands are on my back, thumping and I can't believe it but the fact that his hands are on my body sends a jolt of electricity through me. The feeling prompts a realization and I… N-no way. It can't be…

I…I like Nai?

"Gareki, are you okay?" Nai questions worriedly but I'm panicking too much inside.

"Fine." My voice comes out, strangled.

It can't be,right? But it has to be…I've been feeling so weird all this time. I thought, I know I like Nai…But this way?

The thought drives me insane. Am I? Could I? Was I?

I'm staring at Nai and he's staring back at me. He's shaking slightly from having all of my focus on him, unfamiliar to him as it is. His hands are still on my back and we're standing too close to each other. I'm towering over him, his own back pressed into the boxes he was sitting on .His cheeks are slightly red and he's looking away now. I can feel the heat in my own cheeks but-

"Gareki..I..we're too close.." It strikes me then that Nai's…Nai's stuttering? Does he..Does he like me too?

We're still in that position when I hear that familiar voice again. We spring apart. I fall back behind me into the boxes for last year's play props. The crashing noise leads the three figures to us.

Yogi grinning at us,his eyes filled with mirth. Tsukumo rushes over to help me up and a young man ,taller than me goes over to Nai.

As we stand up and brush ourselves off, Yogi introduces the young man to me.

He's taller than me and of a slim build with slightly long-ish hair,his bangs falling to cover his eyes partially. He smiles at me and somehow, I get the feeling it's not very friendly.

"Hello, Gareki-kun," he puts his hand out for me to shake. "I'm Karoku."

****

_In which Nyanpello has a performance!_

**_Nai_**

Gareki and Karoku stare at each other for a bit before Gareki shakes his hand. Their eyes are kind of darker than usual as they size up each other. I look back and forth at them and feel a little worried. Do they not like each other? Maybe I was wrong? Gareki's tall but Karoku is slightly taller than him. He doesn't have to look down at him but I get the feeling that Karoku has somehow grown taller and is staring down at Gareki. It makes Gareki narrow his eyes a bit and I bit down on my lip.

It feels so tense.

I think Yogi must have picked up on the mood because he slings an arm around Gareki's shoulders. A warm feeling pools in my stomach when he does that. I thought about it the other day and..I don't want to admit it..but I'm jealous that Yogi can touch Gareki so easily. Gareki might scowl but he doesn't push Yogi away. If I did that..would he be okay with it? Yogi flashes a grin at Karoku and I before saying that we have to get out now and find good seats in the audience because the play is starting soon.

"Play?" I ask.

"Yup,Little Nai! I'm Nyanpello!" He reaches over to ruffle my hair and then points to Tsukumo, "And Tsukumo's the prince!"

Tsukumo gives a small smile. "They decided that gender-bending might be fun."

At this, finally Gareki and Karoku break their eye contact.

"Tsukumo-senpai," Gareki smiles. "Break a leg!"

"Break a leg!" I exclaim,jumping backwards in shock. "Ga-gareki,you can't just tell someone to-"

They all laugh at me. Yogi with his warm,mellow laugh. Karoku's deep-throated. Tsukumo's sweet,soft tinkles like peals of bell. And Gareki's loud,barking laughter.

"It's an expression,Nai." Karoku tells me,slipping his hand into mine. I accept it easily because we usually hold hands. I notice Gareki seeing our hands and his expression shutters slightly. He looks away and I feel my cheeks getting warm,just looking at him because it reminds me of him looking at me, over me against those boxes and oh,I feel so weird.

"Nai?" Karoku pokes my shoulder. "Are you okay? Your face is all red."

"I'm okay," I mutter.

Yogi coughs and with his arm still around Gareki's shoulder, he leads us out the door to the auditorium.

**_Gareki_**

The auditorium is dimly lit and I'm glad for the (almost but not quite) cover of darkness. It means that I can't see Karoku's eyes on me any longer. I mean, I can still feel it but at the very least, I don't have those brown eyes looking at me all accusatory. Nai has seated himself between the two of us and for that I'm grateful. The further I am from that guy, the better. Up on stage, the play hasn't started yet and the audience titters among themselves. To my annoyance, Karoku is still holding Nai's hand.

Is that really necessary? Nai's not ten. He's a big boy. He's a... I sink down in my seat, feeling warm under the collar. Let's not go down that particular lane,Gareki,old boy.

"Oh!Oh!" Nai hits my armrest in excitement. "Ow!" What an idiot... He brushes it aside and tells me,"Gareki,it's starting!"

"Nai,are you okay?" That guy's face looms over Nai's seat, looking over in worry and I edge away in my own space. Man...seriously? He has a brother complex.

"He's fine," I snap. Karoku glares at me and Nai pouts.

"I'm okay, Karoku."

Karoku turns to Nai and smiles. "Alright then." He looks back at me as Nai watches the curtains go up. The air crackles with the electricity between us.

Alright, so I'll admit it now. Grudgingly, reluctantly, definitely,certainly stupidly but...I like Nai. I think this to myself as one of the seniors narrates the a deep voice, he tells us that,

_"The princess has long given up hope on the prince ever coming. In a bizarre twist, she dresses up as Nyanpello to pass the that no one will ever find out,she lounges about in the furry cat costume."_

Yogi comes out and practically throws himself on to the sofa in the middle of the stage. He's wearing that stupid costume as expected. Sighing dramatically; he says his lines," Oh, when shall my love ever arrive?"

That's it. I ignore the play in favour of pondering on my own thoughts in the dark. I'll pay attention once Tsukumo comes along. With the way Yogi's angst-ing right now and his acting's enough to put me off, I don't think that's going to be until the second act.

Anyway.

But I'll be damned if I ever let that guy know. He's too hung up on Nai. He's not going to like it if I...if I...if I date . Do I want to date Nai? I mean, like...does Nai even like me? What if he doesn't? God,I'm just going to humiliate myself if I go and ask him out. And he  _refuses._ My stomach plummets at the thought and I cringe inwardly. I just don't think I can deal with rejection from Nai. Sweet, idiotic Nai of all people.

How can it be this way? I think to myself. Just when did I fall for that airhead. I did think he was cute from the start but somehow I fell for him along the way. I fell for the way he tried hard in everything he did and how he was always cheerful. I liked his innocence because it reminded me so much of something I myself didn't possess. How could I? After being abandoned and left to forage on my own, to being moved around from city to city, foster home to foster home until Hirato took me under a special scholarship that stipulated I was to be under the school even after graduation. I had turned bitter and jaded, unable to smile without feeling a strain in my chest. But Nai made happiness seem effortless. Nai...Nai was special.

"Hello, Gareki."

I almost jump out of my seat in fright. No, wait, that's wrong. I'm not scared like some pansy. I was just surprised, that's all.

"When did you get here?" I hiss at that stupid speccie who appeared out of nowhere beside me.

"I've been here for some 't you notice?" He raises an eyebrow and smirks at me. "My, you must have been working too hard."

"Gareki?" I turn to my other side to see Nai leaning over. "Are you okay?" he questions.

"Yeah,I am," I brush it off and focus on Nai instead. The way his eyes reflect the light from the stage and his pretty pink lips have fallen open when he asked me. Those lips...

No!Wait! What am I thinking! Don't you dare let your mind go down that path...

"Hi, Nai!" That stupid speccie leaned over me as though I wasn't even in the way to wave.

"Hirato-san!" Nai ducked his head down in lieu of a bow.

"How are you enjoying the play?"

"It's good!" They nattered on,oblivious to the annoyed people shushing behind us. I sink down in my seat, feeling like an inconsiderate imbecile. They've even managed to drag that Karoku guy into the conversation and from listening, it seems that Karoku's Hirato's old friend from high school.

"Remember Akari?"

"Oh yes, where is he now anyway?"

"He's working at the ministry of health at the moment, can you imagine?"

"How nice.." Karoku smiles widely. "I don't suppose you two have...?"

Hirato laughs aloud and the annoyed shushing grows louder into more irate,likely to beat you in shushing.

"He hasn't come around yet."

I roll my eyes and try to huddle in on myself. I can't think anymore with these idiots talking over my head.

On stage, Tsukumo has come on and I thank the stars above for a distraction.

"Look, Tsukumo's come on. So will you please shut up?" I direct this mostly at Hirato because if it was at Nai,Nai would get upset and I do  _not_ want to get the Karoku guy angry for Nai's sake. Hirato is a safe bet because he hardly ever rises to any of my baits.

As expected, they all sit back. Nai looking slightly upset, Hirato with a bright smile (I really want to punch him sometimes.) and that Karoku guy too after sending a glare my way.

On stage, Tsukumo's character gives a soliloquy about how love transcends all forms. Bit sappy but the audience eats it up. She strides over to Yogi and with an almost unnoticeable grimace, presses her lips to his consume-covered one's. Erk. From the way her shoulders are tensed, I can tell she isn't happy about this. The curtain falls at this and one of the minor characters comes out with a signboard.

"And they lived happily after!"

The cast comes out, Yogi having shed the cat head and holding hands with Tsukumo, beams at the audience. They take a bow and I clap along with the rest of them.

My eyes are fixed on the sign though.

_Happily ever after._

_****_

 

_In which a decision is made._

**_Nai_**

A week has passed since the school showcase event and Gareki's been acting weird. He doesn't look me quite in the eye and when he talks to me, he's always looking down or away. His eyes are a shade darker and sometimes I wonder if I did something because it feels like I did. Gareki won't speak to me unless he has to and he doesn't touch me at all. I wonder if Karoku said anything. After the play, Karoku and Gareki had walked behind Hirato-san and I when we went backstage to congratulate Tsukumo-senpai and Yogi-senpai. I tried to listen to what they were saying but they spoke in low whispers and it was difficult. Everybody around us was talking so loudly about the play, it gave me a headache. Sometimes that happens. When it's too loud or there are too many voices, I can't differentiate one from another.

All I know is that afterwards, Gareki wouldn't look at me the same. Did Karoku say something? The thought makes me feel so small inside. It can't be that,right? What if he did? What did he say? I want to know but I don't want to as well.

It might be better this way? I like Gareki, I really really like him and I would never ever want him to be sad but...the thought of it fills my eyes with tears,I am making him sad. It's because of me,isn't it?I slump over in my seat, ignoring Yanari beside me. He shoots me a worried look and leans over.

"Nai,what's wrong?" He pokes me in the ribs. "Oy, sit up. Iva-san will be after our skins if you keep slumping over like that. You know how she is."

"I don't want to, Yanari," I cover my face with my arms. "I feel sick."

"Sick?" He questions and I can hear the concern in his voice. It makes me feel even sicker that he's worried for me. Why do I make everyone worry?

He moves away and I think that he's left me alone. But instead, from the corner of my eye, I see Yanari wave at comes over and I groan inwardly, knowing now what Yanari wanted to do.

"Iva-san," Yanari says. "Can I bring Nai over to Tsukitatchi-san? I think he's sick."

"Does he need to go home?"

"I think so. He didn't eat at all during lunch and his eyes are really red."

"Nai-kun, please look up." I swallow at Iva-san's request and does as she says. She looks at me closely and presses the back of her hand to my forehead.

"I don't think it's a fever but bring him to the nurse anyway. Yanari, could you do that?"

Yanari nods and helps me up. We walk out of the classroom together and Iva-san sees us off at the classroom door.

"Nai, go sleep it off. Afterwards, you can come back to lessons or if you're done for the day, go home. Make sure you go with someone,alright? Don't just go home on your own." Iva-san advises me with a hand on my shoulder reassuringly. It's not very reassuring though. I know I'm not sick. But I can't stop feeling sick anyway. I feel guilty and bad all inside. I feel like I want to cry, everything's so bad and Gareki doesn't like me and what am I going to do?

Without realizing it, I've already been brought to the nurse's office. Yanari brings me in.

"Tsukitatchi-san?" He calls around the curtain.

"Ah, yes?" The tall man dressed in a white coat comes out from behind. "Yanari-kun!" He says, surprised. "Are you ill?"

"It's not me, Tsukitatchi-san. It's Nai." Yanari pushes me forward slightly from behind. "He didn't eat at all during lunch. I think he's lost his appetite. And his eyes are all red."

Tsukitatchi-san smiles at me before gesturing me forward. "Come over here and sit on the edge of the bed.I'll look you over."

He checks for a fever and my pulse before looking at me for a minute. "I think he's exhausted. Have you gotten enough sleep, Nai-kun?"

"I'm okay," I say but the moment he mentions 'sleep', I yawn. He chuckles at that and tells Yanari,"Yup, he's just tired. Go back to class, Yanari-kun. I'll give Nai a pill to sleep a little better."

"No way!" Yanari says, "I have to be here for Nai!"

Tsukitatchi-san just outright laughs in Yanari's face. "Go to class, Yanari-kun. I won't eat him, he'll be okay. Just because you want to miss class..."

"I wouldn't want to!" Yanari sneers but the disappointment in his eyes more than tells the truth. "Fine then. Nai,I'll go back first. I'll come see you later!"

Tsukitatchi-san fumbles around his drawers before pulling out a pill and giving it to me.

"It's a sleeping pill," he tells me. "You'll feel a little drowsy but then you'll fall asleep right away."

I nod. "Thank you, Tsukitatchi-san."

He's right. After I take the pill, I really do become drowsier and my eyes keep fluttering close. But on the other hand, I can think a lot clearer than before. I remember back when I was smaller, how I had gotten lost in a shopping mall and I kept crying.

I cried and cried on a bench near the fountain. Fat tears rolling down my cheeks. Even when the tears had stopped and the wetness had dried, the same paralyzing fear that I had been left behind still stayed. Then I just keep silent and watched other people go by, walking past and away, caught up in their own lives. I was found pretty quickly about an hour later. But that hour seemed to stretch into forever back then. But just as I couldn't forget that fear of having been left behind, I remembered the happiness that filled me when Karoku had caught me in his arms and didn't let go. He had ran to me, eyes full of naked worry and I felt terrible,sick for making him so worried but-oh, to be worried like that...meant that he cared.

Then I thought about Gareki and I could see him fuzzily in my mind's eye. The longer I thought about him the clearer he got. Gareki laughing at me,that short, harsh bark and I felt a pang in my heart to realise I haven't heard his laugh in so long already. Gareki, looking at me from under his long fringe, eyes dark and luminous as the sun set behind him, casting an orange glow about the room. Gareki with his lips tilted upwards in that smirk.

It made me more aware of how far he is now. How he couldn't or wouldn't look at me any longer and he was frowning. His words came out in short, abrupt sentences out of necessity and nothing more. Of how he only gave what was required now, no more small, awkward touches on the shoulder or weird snarks that were actually jokes.

I don't...I don't think Gareki likes me anymore. I don't know what went wrong. I...From now on, so that I don't make him sad, I shouldn't be near thought makes me feel like crying but this is all for the best. The haze in my mind is getting stronger. I try to struggle against it but I find I can't really string any coherent thoughts any longer...

I give in and I'm relieved for the sleep that takes me in and away.

****

_In which Gareki brings Nai home._

**_Gareki_**

It's after school and I'm sitting, waiting in the workshop for Nai. Now that the school showcase is over, there isn't really much to do. I can work on the prototype at home because it's more or less mostly done. There's more material at home too so really, it's better for me. I guess it means that we won't be meeting each other at the workshop anymore.

But it doesn't mean we'll stop meeting... My mind supplies and I feel heat rush to my cheeks again.I've decided that I'm...I'm going to ask Nai out. Soon. Which will be as soon as I can dredge up enough courage. And as soon as I can get myself to look at him in the eye properly.

I'm not sure at all when the hell I started to become such a wuss. Of course then again, the conversation I had with that guy didn't help matters.

_"So. Gareki-kun."_

_I looked at that guy from the corner of my eye. We were both walking far behind both the stupid speccie and Nai. He was smiling at me slightly. I guess part of my impression of him from Nai's stories were right. He was good-looking,if you considered the whole tall, rakish pale hair in eyes and long,thin frame attractive. The kind part? Not too sure, but he was fiercely protective of Nai as I would soon find out._

_"Hm?" I gave a non-commital sound, not exactly as rude as a grunt but definitely not that polite either. But to hell with it, I'm not going to be bending over for him anytime soon._

_"Nai and you are close." It was a statement rather than a question._

_"Ah...I suppose we are."_

_"Maybe a bit too close?" It was a question but one he seemed to already have an answer to._

_I kept quiet, deciding to keep my cards close to my chest._

_"Nai talks about you a lot." He continued, ignoring that I hadn't replied. "I'm assuming you don't talk much about Nai? You don't seem like the type to."_

_By this point of time, both Nai and the speccie had momentarily gotten far ahead of us in the crowd and we were simply moving forward with the rest. Damnit. I did not like where this conversation was going. The crowd moved noisily around us and all I could hear somehow over the din was the man's words._

_"Now,I don't know about you,Gareki-kun. But Nai likes you." He said simply, eyes narrowed at me but his lips curved in a smile. A disarmingly amiable smile like he was just talking about the weather._

_My eyes widened at that._

_"I..." I stammered out stupidly before recovering. I scoffed. "Nai likes everybody."_

_"No," That guy shook his head. "He likes you."_

_I shook my head. This guy's complex is worse than I thought. On the bright side, he hadn't swung at me and I thought he would have already._

_"Now,w_ _hat you decide to do is your choice. But rest assured..." His face darkened and I was honestly, honestly scared. There didn't seem to be anyone around us, just him and me looking at each other._

_"If you make the wrong choice and Nai gets hurt... You'll being hurting next." He said in a low whisper._

_He's insane, I thought to myself._

_I looked away at Nai's small figure far ahead of me in the crowd.I mean..._

_"Tch. I wouldn't hurt Nai."_

In a way, I guess it was good that he had just come out with it in a straight-forward manner. It had given me enough push to decide that I would ask Nai out. Not steady just...out. We could go out somewhere together on a...My stomach plunges at the thought. On a date. It gave me the shivers to even imagine that we'd be that way.

I like him sure but I'm not sure that I want to be boyfriends, of all things. Boyfriends. The word seemed to mock me. It seemed so corny and I grimace.

I look up at the clock. To my surprise, almost half an hour had passed and Nai still wasn't here. How am I going to ask him out if he isn't even here! The door opens abruptly and a red-haired boy (girl?) comes in.

"Gareki-senpai?"

I look up to see the...um,person bending over and wheezing in short gasps. Well, but the word wheezing does imply that... The boy (I realise as he straightens. He's wearing the male uniform after all.)

He repeats it again and I realise that I hadn't replied to him.

"Yeah?" I give him a nod.

"Nai's in the nurse's office right now," he tells me, having calmed down enough.

"The nurse's office? Why?" I ask, my voice is louder than usual. I brush it off as surprise but the voice in the back of my head snidely informs me that it's closer to worry actually.

He looks taken aback and takes a moment before answering. "He's running up a fever. I was going to ask if maybe you could take him home? I was going to but my chauffeur says he can't make any detours."

I think about it before pushing myself off the windowsill where I had been sitting. "Alright," I say evenly, ignoring the way my heart is thumping against my ribcage. I collect my things from the desk and shove it all into my bag.

"Alright. Let's go."

* * *

The walk down to the nurse's office is nothing short of awkward in all honesty. Usually, most people would try and make small talk but this kid didn't seem interested in it so I couldn't really do my usual response: nod occasionally. There was nothing to nod to. Out of the corner of my eye, I study him. His uniform was rather unkempt from all the running he did before but he carried himself with a regal,snooty air. He didn't look at anything else but straight ahead. I wonder why he didn't cut his hair shorter, with his hair that length, wouldn't he be mistaken for a girl regularly?

"We're here," he announces abruptly and I almost walked right into him.

"Ah, right..." I scratch the back of my head. "Thanks, I'll bring him home, I suppose."

He gives a small bow to that. "I owe you a favour. Thank you for doing this for my friend." He says formally.

Well...this really is awkward. I just nod to that and hurry in the office.

The nurse's door clicks open when I slip in. Tsukitatchi-san, wasn't it? He comes out and smiles at me, the wrinkles around his eyes are more pronounced when he does that.

"Hello, what are you here for?" He questions.

"I'm here for Nai-kun, sir. His friend couldn't bring him home so I told him I would."

"Ah..Yanari-kun wasn't able to? Well, you can see Nai-kun while I go fill out the release form." he gestures to a cordoned off area with a white curtain around it in the corner.

I pull it back and heave a sigh that I didn't know I was holding in. Nai's sleeping, curled up in a fetal position. Nai's face is red and when I place my hand on his forehead, he's burning up. It's really hot and I dab at his face with the wet cloth on the dresser beside the bed. He's clutching on to a pillow and I try to wake him up.

"Nai." I say loudly.

"Ngh," he swats my hand away. "G' 'way, Karoku."

Tsukitatchi-san comes back in and laughs softly. "The medicine's made him drowsy. He won't wake up easily."

"But..how am I supposed to get him back?"

"Carry him, boy. He looks like a lightweight."

I gape at the nurse. "Are you serious?"

"Yes, I am. Nothing's wrong with it. The two of you are friends, after all." His smile is a little too playful and I wonder if he knows something. Right then, Nai mutters something that we almost don't catch but the word is discernible anyway.

"Ga...re..ki."

Heat warms my cheeks up. "Okay."

* * *

The walk to the bus stop is uncomfortable. I can hear the whispers of the other students as I carry Nai on my back down the hill. He sees to be awake but not properly. All he can manage to muster up is some oddly cute groggy sounds. Did I just think "cute"? Augh...what am I doing? I'm sorely tempted to let him slide off my back and run all the way back home.

Okay so he's not that heavy and things could be worse. Like if Yogi didn't have an afternoon tutorial. Or if someone whose opinion I actually gave a damn for saw us. But all there was would just lots of giggling and snide comments.

The ride on the bus isn't too bad either. I just shove him into the seat and sit beside him while his head lolls over the place.

I might have...put his head on my shoulder so that it's more comfortable. I mean, maybe. Not that I'm saying I did.

Anyway, Nai's still groggy when I finally get him back to his apartment and it turns out nobody's home. That Karoku guy wasn't back yet and so I had to fish around in Nai's bag for his keys. I finally found it in the front pocket.

Pushing Nai in and closing the door after me, I realise that it's definitely creepy that I'm here. In his apartment. Alone with just him.

Nai stumbles off into a room at the side. Following him, I realise that it's his room. His room looks...clean enough, I guess. The bed is pushed to the side and there's a chest of drawers at the foot of the bed. Nai's sitting on the edge and trying to pull the blanket around him.

"So...cold," he shivers. Feeling sorry, I walk back out and try search around for something cold. He's not really feeling cold, it's just his fever. While it'd be good for him to sweat it out, he can't afford to get dehydrated. What's more important is he brings his temperature down. Finding a cold pack in the fridge, I bring it to Nai only to find that he's cocooned himself in the bed even with his shoes on.

"Nai," I shake my head. Hasn't this kid ever gotten sick before?

He groans and I feel even sorrier. I pull his shoes off, leaving the stripy red-and-gold socks on and move closer to him to place the cold pack on his head. At first, he tries to get it off him because the sudden drop in temperature hurts but eventually he gives up when he realizes I'll put it back on when he pushes it off. I've been here for almost ten minutes, steadying the cold pack on Nai's forehead.

With a start, I realise that he's too quiet. On closer inspection, he's sleeping.

That-! Ugh, what am I even doing? I get up and decide that I should just go now. I've made sure he'll be okay. There's a glass of water beside him and I checked that there's medicine.I put it on the table outside.

There's just one thing...It won't hurt if I...

_It won't_ ,I tell myself, _it won't._

I press my lips to Nai's forehead.

"Get well soon," I whisper, feeling like a complete creep.

I hurry out the apartment then and lean on the wall outside, breathing heavily.

Oh shit, what have I done?

****

_Finally._

**_Nai_**

When I open my eyes, I'm surprised. I'm back in my room, not in the nurse's office. When I had last been awake, it was bright and early in the afternoon as well. Night had fallen already though and by how dark it was,it had fallen quite a few hours ago. I shift over in my bed and notice there was light seeping from underneath the closed door. Karoku was probably home. I sit up groggily and walk out of my room.

Karoku looked up immediately when I open the door. He was still dressed in his school clothes and his hair was messy.

"Nai!" Karoku smiles. "How do you feel now?Better?"

I nod slowly. "Yes...I feel a lot better." I lied,ignoring the exhaustion in my bones and the heaviness in my head. I figured both were just side-effects of the sickness though. It happens sometimes.

"I made macaroni and soup tonight," Karoku said, coming over to press the back of his hand to my forehead. "A bit warm but at least, you're not burning like you were a few hours back."

I grimace at that. "I'll go eat now."

While I ate my dinner, I remember something suddenly. I was in school just now..how on earth did I get back home?

"Karoku?" I call to him. He was lying on the sofa, reading a textbook. He didn't look up and continued skimming through his textbook idly.

"Hm?"

"Who brought me back home?"

Karoku looks up then, furrowing his brow. "Huh? Didn't you come back by yourself?"

I shake my head. "Maybe it was Yanari. I'll call him later to thank him."

I forget to call him. After I took my medicine,I felt drowsy so I went back to sleep straight away. It was only the next day when I was at school and saw Yanari that I remember.

"Yanari!"

"Nai?" Yanari turns around and smiles at me. "How are you feeling? Better?"

"Yeah! Yanari, thank you so much for bringing me back home yesterday!"

"Hnh? I didn't bring you back home, Nai."

"Then...who?" I could feel my smile slipping off my face. This was confusing me. If it's not Yanari,who could it be?

"It was Gareki-senpai. I was busy in the afternoon so I asked him to help me bring you home."

"Ga..Gareki?" I stammer. My eyes widen and my heart starts racing.

The bell rings suddenly,signaling that it was the start of fifth period. Yanari grabs his books from the locker and dashes off with a "Thank him!Not me!"

I stand there, still and confused. Gareki brought me back home? Why?

I walk slowly to class and sit down. The teacher starts up his lesson and I lean on my arm,cupping one side of my face with a hand. I don't understand what's going on. And why can't I remember? All I remember was the sound of crunchy leaves underfoot,busy street sounds and a small,brief pressing of lips to my forehead. Wait...what?

Once school is over, I rush over to the workshop. I find Gareki just where I thought he would be. He's sitting by the windowsill, one of his legs bent and pressed to his chest while the other dangled over the edge. He was staring out of the window so I couldn't make out his expression. The light from outside spilled over him, highlighting and accentuating all of his attractive qualities. High cheekbones, long and slender neck. Pale,thin fingers drumming against his knee. He turns abruptly as though he had just realized he was not alone in the room. He turns and his eyes meet mine.

"Gareki." I say.

**Gareki**

I turn around and stilled. Nai was standing there, looking at me. His eyes were dark, slightly hooded and his cheeks were bright red. Was he still sick?

"Nai?" I ask carefully in an even, measured tone. "What's wrong?Do you still feel sick?"

He shakes his head quickly, "I'm fine." He looked away at the corner of the room. My heart was beating quickly and my hands were shaking, a habit that I had whenever I became nervous. I clenched them into fists to stop the trembling.

Nai was still looking away from me when he spoke up again. His blonde hair was getting too long and fell into his eyes, covering it. I resist the urge to sweep it to one side.

"Ga-Gareki, did you bring me home yesterday?" He asks.

Heat immediately rushes up to my cheeks. I stuttered out a "Yeah."

"...Why?" His question was soft and if it was lucky the workshop was silent or I wouldn't have heard him at all.

I was able to raise an eyebrow despite my nervousness. "What do you mean why? Why shouldn't I?"

"...Don't you hate me?"

"Hate?" I repeat, feeling more confused than nervous now.

"You don't talk to me nowadays and you don't touch me... Gareki, you don't even look at me much anymore."

I stare at Nai for a few seconds before the pieces fell into place in my head. He thought I hated him? I was only doing those things to stop complicating things for myself and my feelings. I didn't even think about how that would make him feel. I was selfish, I realise. I just didn't want to deal with all these feelings for Nai. I didn't want to feel jittery and stupid all the time around him. I didn't want to deal with trembling hands and the constant embarrassment I always seemed to feel around him.

"Nai," I push myself off the windowsill and took a step forward. "I...I don't hate you."

This is it,Gareki. Tell him. Tell him now.

"I like you." I tell him simply, only a few steps away from him.

"I like you too." Nai blinks at me but I could see the unshed tears in his eyes.

I reach a shaky hand out and cupped his chin,angling it upwards.

"No," I swallow. "I  _like_ you."

I closed the distance between us with a kiss. I pressed my lips to his's briefly. My stomach twisted and turned at my action. What was I doing? But in those few moments it felt like I had nothing to lose and everything to gain. His lips were warm and I felt myself smiling into it unconsciously. When we finally broke apart, Nai opened his eyes and stared at me, completely surprised.

Shit. What have I done?

"Nai," I stutter. "I-"

"Gareki," Nai smiled. "I think I get it now."

"Gareki, I  _like_  you too."

****

 

_Epilogue_

**_Gareki_**

His phone rings and he falls out of bed. The dark-haired boy hits his head on the ground and groans, muttering a string of curses under his breath. He swears when he finds that he's fallen asleep while he was doing work again and he must have rolled over some of the papers. The blueprints are creased and the reference books he had been using have closed shut. He's forgotten which page he needed and feels a stab of more than just annoyance. Outside the sun has already risen high in the sky and he gives a start when he realises this.

He flips open his phone and reads the text message quickly. He reads it before flinging the phone to his bed and rushing to take a shower.

The message reads from someone named Nai.

_whr r u?_

**_Nai_**

The boy called Nai sits, waiting at the bus stop with an older man. The older man is scribbling in a notebook on his lap. The two of them are having a conversation.

"Are you sure he's coming,Nai?"

"Yes,I'm sure,Karoku."

"...you're going to be late if you miss this bus, you know."

Nai isn't sure what to say to that but when he looks off into the distance and squints, he sees a familiar figure. When the other boy sees him  _see_  him, he starts making some sort of sound.

It appears to be screaming. Nai wonders to himself what on earth is going on when he feels Karoku tug on his shirt. He turns around to question but realises why he was tugging on his shirt. The bus is coming around the bend. And they might not make it.

The bus shudders to a stop in front of Nai, the person he's been waiting for still has a good 500 metres to go.

"Wait," he tells the driver and the driver nods.

Finally, finally, the dark-haired boy arrives and he jumps on the bus, ignoring the man named Karoku's indignant shout of "Where's my greeting, you bastard!" and shoves Nai in. The doors close and the two collapse together on the seat in the middle row. The bus is mostly empty now because it's already late. Most of the students have already gone to school.

"I thought you might not make it,Gareki." The younger boy smiles. "I'm glad you did." He moves closer, angling his head.

"I thought I might not too." He cups the other's chin and brings them together for a slow, lingering kiss.

Gareki remembers his dream of a white-haired boy as he kisses this white-haired boy.

When they part, Gareki smiles at Nai, his eyes crinkling at the sides.

"I'm glad I made it."


End file.
